Lil Spill

Saturday, February 28, 2004

Lee is in Atlantic City right now checking out a few spaces. When he goes away he is required to keep a diary log so that I can check his thoughts on the locations he has seen and revert back if I need to. He wrote the funniest diary entry yesterday. Here are bits and pieces of it. ( He is at the HIP Club in A.C)

“To understand these bartenders let me paint a picture…

Imagine, if you will, a new bartender who is partially blind and addicted to valium. Then imagine a person who was born WITHOUT the gene that is responsible for creating a sense of urgency. Then, imagine the bar was flooded with the thickest molasses ever created, and imagine it KNEE HIGH. Ok…so 15 mins later when I finally got my $6 bottle of beer, I started to check out there go-go dancers.

There were 2 dancing on the bar and another on a box. Now imagine Esther from Austin. Now take away her stunning good looks, her long torso, her hight, and her dancing abilities (ahem..), and make her 5’5″ add 40 pounds, put them in boy shorts and middrift tops and you may have a VAGUE concept of how bad they sucked. They also were pretty rude to people trying to order a drink at the bar. Their BEST dancer had good abs, was black, long hair in braids and NO SHIRT…cause it was a GUY! How pathetic is that?! The second string of go-go dancers were actually pretty hot but see previous description for dancing abilities.

So I spent $16. Once when I was about 10 these high school kids conned me out of $16 for a comic book that was not real and then kicked me SQUARE in my BALLS….that was better spent then my night here in Atlantic City. “

Thank you Lee, you made my day with your funny notes. Keep up the good work.

posted by Liliana @ 12:01 PM

Friday, February 27, 2004

First I will tell a funny story then I will bitch about having a bad day. So Aaron takes the Austin girls and Tara out on the town Wed. night. This was a kind of thank you for flying in to help for Mardi Gras. Well of course you can’t go to New Orleans without going to a strip club!! So they go to the Gold Club, I think it was amateur night or something. Well some stripper comes out in a girl scout uniform and starts throwing girl scout cookies to the crowd. Well Emmy (Austin Coyote) screams out that she wants a cookie. The stripper parks herself in front of Emmy puts whip cream on her crotch (supposedly she still had a thong on) then sticks a cookie on top. She then pushes Emmy’s face in her crotch and Emmy has to eat the cookie. I would of loved to see Emmy’s face covered with whip cream after eating that girls crotch. Puts a whole new taste on the girl scout cookie.

So for the last month we have been filming an episode of “Faking It” at the New Orleans bar. So the producers of this show brought a shy librarian in from Texas. She lived with Chantel for a month. And was trained by both Chantel and Tara to be a Coyote. Today was the last episode. They brought in 3 judges and pit the librarian (Hailey) against 3 of my girls. The judges have to pick the faker. Oh my god, I got down there and all my girls were in an uproar. One of the judges is the GM of the Atlanta bar and I guess she said a few things that are directly against my rules. I guess the first thing she said was that she doesn’t encourage the Coyotes to wear skirts but if they do it is mandatory to wear biker shorts underneath. Well I love when the girls wear skirts and I tell them to wear bloomers etc (just not thongs). Secondly, the faker (Hailey) gave a speech about how empowering it is as a woman to be a Coyote. Well the GM of Atlanta said that that was Bullshit. I am very disturbed about that. I specifically tell the girls they are powerful, sexy women. Being a Coyote is about being strong and they should feel empowered as women. OK all of that being said, what disturbed me is how upset my girls were over this. “To all of my girls!! The girls I have trained, the girls that work in my Coyotes. You guys will always have an edge. You guess are being trained by the original Coyote ME!!!” But on the other hand cut this woman some slack, I have never trained her. She has never even been to one of the bars I run. Tonight I will spend some time talking to her. This is why I don’t want to franchise anymore, things get distorted. I really like the Atlanta bar. The girls are great. So a note to my girls cut them some slack.
Hailey made me a piece of jewelry. Thank you.

Well on a good note Minnesota and San Antonio are moving forward so we’ll be rocking in those places soon. Australia, I’m coming to check out a few places. A lot of infringers in Australia. This should be fun showing them how it’s really done.

posted by Liliana @ 7:16 PM

Wednesday, February 25, 2004

I am bone tired. I love you guys ( New Orleans crew) but I think I need to conveniently be away next Mardi Gras.

OK some guy bought a body shot off of me for $200. Well he was very persistent about having someone take a picture of him while he got this body shot. Well, I had one of the girls use my camera and took the picture. About 10 minutes go by and he say to me ” Lil, where is my picture?’ So I tell him that I will e-mail it to him. ” I want the picture now!” Too bad, I’m not giving you my memory card and losing all my pictures. Well this went on for about 10 minutes. What I really think is the poor guy started freaking that he just paid $200 for a bodyshot and his wife was going to get the credit card bill. Well, houseboy was there and decides to get involved. That shit drives me crazy but let me go on with the story. Houseboy is a very goodlooking, 6ft 5in black man. He is well aware that people may be scared of him. So he puts his arm around this guy and starts giving a speech about how I am his friend, blah,bah blah. ” See this woman? This is my friend Lil. When people upset my friends that upsets me. ” ( of course this whole time the guy is shitting a brick. He’s got this huge black man talking down to him.) ” We all came here to have a good time at my friend Lil’s place. My tab is at least $200 everytime I come in here. Do you understand that I’m upset if my friend is upset?” This went on. Well the guy naturally calmed down. And unfortunately for houseboy, he hung around him for the rest of the night. By the way houseboy would like me to clarify that he didn’t say he would be my houseboy, but he loves cooking and cleaning. Hence he would be anyone’s houseboy if they would let him clean there house. I think he might have OCD. Regardless of all that. Thanks Houseboy!
Kevin is pissed because Lee is spending the next month in Germany and Amsterdam. ( Lee have a great time. Find us something great. I’m so excited for you going to Europe for the first time. I’m going to miss you.) Well Kevin wouldn’t be so upset if I didn’t ask him to accompany me to Dubai for a business meeting. Kevin then asks me ” where is Dubai?” When I told him it was the middle east, he definitely was less than pleased. ” Lee gets to go to Europe, I’m going to the middle east.” Truth be told I have heard that Dubai is wonderful.
I have tons of stories and very little time so I will catch up later this week.
I would like to send my heartfelt wishes to Redneck Lou from NY. His mom died yesterday and I hope he is alright. I love you Lou!!!

posted by Liliana @ 11:18 AM

Tuesday, February 24, 2004

I am so proud of everyone. The girls, the barbacks, the bouncers, the beertub girls and the merch girls. By this time last year the girls were falling apart. Today the girls were still on their game. It’s funny, pre mardi Gras I asked Aaron and Chantel if they needed my help. Oh No, we have everything covered. Well for someone who was supposed to be on the sidelines, I ‘m putting in 8-10 hour days at the bar just making drinks. It is so endearing to me to see how much Aaron and Chantel love that bar. I love them for that! Next year we definitely need a third manager, this is too much work for just 2 people. But they are doing a great job.
Nothing ever goes smoothly, today we had our second glitch. First being losing a bartender to Willis from Different Strokes. So today Nina is holding a Southern Comfort bottle. She moves her arm and however destiny is made , that bottle hit Angel square in the nose. Well at first we just thought it was a bad hit nothing major. Well by the end of her shift(8pm) Angel’s eyes were turning black and blue and her nose was swollen. So she and I start toward the local hospital. During mardi gras there is horrific traffic, so I take the back way. We are 3 blocks away from the hospital when someone rear ends me. Did I ever mention in my Lil Spill how much I love my car, 2003 Range Rover ( Arcadia blue). Well I get out of my beautiful brand new ( 6 months old) Range Rover and I go look at the back. It’s a miracle of GOD not one scratch!!! I love that car. Do you know that this is the first new car I have ever owned. The woman who hit me was definitely shaken up. She had a PT cruiser. I would say that she definitely did not come out of that accident as lucky as me.
Angel is pretty diehard. Right now it is midnight, she is just getting out of the hospital and she is scheduled to work in 4 hours for the 4am – noon shift. ” Lil all I need is a shower and some Red Bull and I’m good to go.” There is absolutely noone to releave her so all I can say is: good luck Angel and make a lot of money!!!

Jacqui and I going for a test drive

posted by Liliana @ 12:44 AM

Monday, February 23, 2004

So I was only at the bar for 11 hours yesterday and I am the most rested person of everyone.. I’m too old for this shit. The girls are doing so great. I am so proud of them. Char told me yesterday that she aches from head to toe. But she still has to look forward to 8 hours on ( working ) and then 8 hours off ( sleeping) for the next 3 days. Do you know how grueling that is on your body. Shannon the head of security and I were salivating watching these 3 guys eating whom were parked in the parking lot across the street. They had a beatup van. They opened the back of the van had coolers of beer and a barbeque going. Shannon was getting so riled up ( after working 16 hours straight) ” Lil I would kill for one of their hamburgers.” So being the nice boss I went across the street had a beer and ate a hamburger. Don’t worry I brought one back for Shannon. What you can get with a little sweet talk and a nice set of tits.
The managers are working 16 hour shifts each. I have been going in to try and give them time off. Aaron definitely looked frazzeled last night. He told me he hadn’t had more than 3 hours of sleep each day for 4 nights. Chantel was so tired a guy ordered 2 drinks totaling $8. She could not even add it in her head. Again I want to say how proud I am of all the girls. They are working their asses off.
Now I have been told that I need to remark on Lee’s new “help the company” mentality. He called me yesterday and told me that he had not payperviewed a movie while he was scouting Kansas City. Also to save the company money he took a non direct flight that had 3 layovers.. Again I am so proud.
Even ” house boy” seems to think he deserves some homage on the Lil Spill. Oh ” houseboy” I hope you become a man some day.

posted by Liliana @ 12:21 PM

Saturday, February 21, 2004

This is the surreal coversation between Aaron and I today. Now let me remind you that Mardi Gras started yesterday and we are open 24 hours a day in New Orleans.
Aaron: “Lil, Brandi didn’t show up for her shift today.”
Lil: “Did she call? What happened?”
Aaron: “She went out with Todd Bridges last night and that’s the last I heard.”
Lil: “You mean Willis from Different Strokes.”
Aaron: “Yes, he’s become a regular.”
Lil: ” So let me get this straight. Brandi went out with Willis last night, got fucked up, and didn’t make her shift?”
Aaron: “Yup.”
Lil: “She just lost her job over Todd Bridges. I hope he makes a lot of royalties off that show.”

For god sakes didn’t he steal a car or something? Chantel goes to me this afternoon, “Lil , I can’t believe she fell for him, Gary Coleman made that show!”

posted by Liliana @ 7:56 PM

Craziness last night. Char (NY coyote) and I went on the Budweiser (Clydesdale horses) wagon. So the whole object of this is to throw beads into the crowd. Oh my god there were a million people begging for beads. I can only explain how insane these people are by comparing the scene to the scenes you see on TV. You know how you watch the Discovery Channel and you see all the children and starving people begging for food in Ethiopia? I swear these people have the same look on their faces. Char was screaming out, “What the hell is wrong with you people. It’s only beads.” Well once you get over that, then you start wailing these beads out in the crowd. Char and I nailed a few people. Then you actually start picking and choosing who you will throw beads to. Char picked old people and fat people. She also got a lot of girls to flash us. Well I picked children and fat people. I can’t explain it but I started to get very aggressive with people. People would be in chairs waving to get beads. I would say, “Get off your fat ass if you want some beads. Show some hussle!” I loved the fat people. My god they would run after the beads like it was their last meal. (I have nothing against fat people, it’s just part of the story.). The little kids were great , but they couldn’t catch so the older people would steal the beads from them. At first I would yell at the adults whom were stealing the beads. But then I started yelling at the kids, “Pay attention. Put your arms out and catch!” Char said, “I hope you put in the Lil Spill how funny you are screaming at these people.” It was a lot of fun. Thanks, Bud!!

posted by Liliana @ 9:51 AM

Friday, February 20, 2004

I am laughing so hard!! Lee has been pissing me off because he is trying to get out of traveling. Well he is one of the location scouts, hence he has to travel. Last week he was in Denver. Well after his trip he said to me, I think you are just punishing me by sending me places. Well this week he is in Kansas City. The location that he is scouting is pretty out in the boondocks. The developers are trying to get us in there. There are 3 things around the space that people go to; 1. Furniture Mart , this huge furniture store 2. The Travel Lodge ( ?) A lodge that has a lot of water stuff for kids, 3. And a Hunting and Trapping Museum, 2nd largest taxidermy collection in the states. Well I get a call from Lee yesterday, ” Lil, why is it always me?” So I told him he had to get a picture of himself by one of the taxidermy exhibits. I am going to try and post the picture [click here to see], It is fucking hysterical. By the way don’t feel sorry for Lee, he is going to Germany and Amsterdam next.
So tonight I am actually riding on a float. I can’t wait to throw those beads. Finally I will get to know the other side.

posted by Liliana @ 3:35 PM

Thursday, February 19, 2004

Don’t you worry, I know the secret to getting beads at the parades. Jackson and I got so close that when the people looked right at him they would just hand us beads. The trick is making sure your kid looks like he’s never gotten a Christmas present in his life.
Today, as per usual I was late opening the bar. The girls know the drill. They knock on the door and then I hand them $20 to get Starbucks so I can finish up. I had a meeting today with 2 Italians. I love Italians. It was a father and his daughter. They want me to be the Key note speaker at a Bar/restaurant convention in Italy. He said to me , I think your speech should be about 40 minutes long. 40 minutes, who the hell wants to listen to me for 40 minutes? I figure I’ll have to bring some of the girls, create a video presentation and actually dance. Because I would have to tell the history of the bars and my fucked up childhood to fill 40 minutes.( that really is about 15 minutes) Oh I will have to have a few cocktails for this.

posted by Liliana @ 8:08 PM

Wednesday, February 18, 2004

Tony, Jackson’s dad, took him to another parade last night. Well Jackson had at least 50 strands of beads around his neck when he got home. Tony is possibly the only person I know who is more competitive than me. I was invited to watch a parade with jackson tonight, so I need to pump myself up. I’m petite so it’s hard for me to hold Jackson and jump for the beads. Tony said he would hold jackson up so people would see him . People would automatically want to throw the beads to the cute little boy. Well Jackson is about 40 lbs so that’s going to be hard for me to hold him up and be cutthroat catching these beads. I need to borrow a small infant.
A NY regular asked me recently ” If I buy the bartender a drink during Happy Hour does she get 2for 1?” The answer is no. But good try! He also asked why we don’t allow Freebird to play in the jukebox? The answer: It’s an 11 minute anthem. So I call Jacqui and I asked her to take Freebird off permenantly. her response ” Lil I did. I just replaced it with Stairway to Heaven.” I wasn’t too happy about that but then jacqui said to me. ” You know when you just need to do something funny for yourself. That’s why I put on Stairway to Heaven.” I understood exactly what she was saying because I put on the Bay City Rollers , for exactly that same reason.

posted by Liliana @ 4:09 AM

Tuesday, February 17, 2004

Quickly, because I keep on forgetting to write about it. Robin on the “Real World”. Well let me qualify that I have never seen any of the episodes. My god Robin, you have really dug yourself a nice hole. The funny letters I get are about how annoying she is because she says ” Right On” all the time. Someone actually suggested that we create a drinking promotion at the bars . This is how it would work: Everyone has to buy a shot everytime Robin says ” Right On”. Pretty funny I think. We won’t write about the other letters because they are far from complimentary. Look people, I personally hired Robin. She was sweet, funny, and sexy. About some of the crap she says on the show, she’s going to have to live with that. I hope some of the things I’ve heard aren’t true. Let’s move on.
The fighting between Lee and I still continues. I swear it’s like an episode of Jerry Springer. You know what I would love ( now I have never seen the show, I don’t watch much TV) Have me and Lee go on the Donald Trump show “Entrepeneur”. And pit us against each other. Let’s see who sells the most lemonaid?

posted by Liliana @ 11:37 AM

Parker in Austin. I just got a very nasty letter concerning your ” salesmanship” or lack there of. You just lost 3 customers. Why? Because they ordered a fucking woo woo. Look you don’t have to make the woo woo. In fact you aren’t supposed to. But with your charm and quick wit you should be convincing them to drink something else. Women need to be treated with a bit more finesse. Why you ask? Because I fucking said so. Use your brain. Coyote Ugly employs smart, sexy, tough, and funny women. The letter sent to me just plainly states that you were very mean. Well mean doesn’t translate into sexy and tough. It just means mean. It’s all about sales. ” Well Lil I’ve seen you be mean.” When I’m mean or tough it’s to customers I know can take it. I know that they know the drill and that will help sales. But I also have a kind, nice side ( Lee don’t laugh) and if I see a few women that are a little meek, I will reel them in slowly and gently. Read your customers!!

posted by Liliana @ 11:02 AM

Monday, February 16, 2004

New Orleans girls! I’ve gotten very good reports about you guys from Aaron and Chantel. Excellent. Keep up the good work.
So for those of you who have never been to New Orleans for Mardi Gras let me explain how it works. Mardi Gras is actually the last day before lent ( catholic ordinance). Lent of course being when people give up things, like Alchohol etc. ( So why not drink as much as you can before lent, which is 40 days long) What the people down here do is they have a series of parades that start about a month before and become more frequent as the clock tics toward Mardi Gras day. These parades have floats and have different themes. People whom are on these floats throw beads into the crowd and everyone rallies to catch the beads.
So I bring my son yesterday to one of the parades. The people were so cut throat around us, that they would put their hands in front of our faces to make sure they caught these beads. Well after a half an hour of this, I had had enough. I put Jackson down and told him to make sure he stayed right by mommy. I said ” Jackson, mommy needs to become a little more aggressive so I can get you a string of beads.” So I wait until a strand comes near me and I grab it. So I caught one end and this woman caught the other. I lean close to her and I say ” Let go of the fucking beads, they are for my son!” Jackson was esctatic that he got some beads. The funny part was the woman actually gave us one more strand. We left right after that feeling quite victorious!! I have no idea why people collect these, but I am ready. If my son wants beads, he’ll get beads!!! God Damn it!!

posted by Liliana @ 5:33 PM

Sunday, February 15, 2004

So I have been catching up with my e-mails when low and behold a nasty letter. Someone wanted me to know how rude I was about mentioning negative things about the Dallas bar. Look buddy!! I mention things about all the bars, including my own. Sometimes good sometimes bad. It’s up to the management and the girls to adjust themselves after reading them. Grow up. I like a lot of the Dallas girls. And when I have a chance I am going to go and talk to them face to face.
So some guy just e-mailed me saying he is so happy to have opened his own Coyote ugly in Beirut. ” You are infringing on my trademark!!” “Jeff I hope we are tradmarked there.” Not that I don’t think Beirut is a very nice place, but I think I will pass on visiting right now. I think I just got my trademark rights in Romania and Ch…something. Lee is starting to not like traveling so much. “Well Lee how about we send you to Beirut to check on this infringer? “

posted by Liliana @ 6:10 PM

Saturday, February 14, 2004

I haven’t been to DC since I was nineteen. So about 100 years ago. So I went to the opening of Coyote on Thursday night. Jason the bouncer from the Vegas bar was out front, freezing his ass off. DC girls come down and see him before he goes back to Vegas. Let’s just say that he is “easy on the eyes” That just reminds me that Thursady night some guy came over to introduce himself and that was his opening line, ” Hey Lil I didn’t expect you to be so easy on the eyes.” What did he expect ? I usually get the same line, ” I didn’t realize you were so young and you are not blond like Maria Bello in the movie.”
A few of the Vegas girls were there; Kristy, Farrah, and Jennifer ( I think that’s it.) Kristy was hauling ass behind the bar most of the night. They have some really cute girls here. There was a girl, now don’t be pissed if I don’t get this right, her name was Hung Li. She was great. I told her to be more aggressive at the merch sales and she definitely started getting into the swing of things.
So I was invited to an employee meeting that they were having on Friday. It’s actually interesting, remember they are a licensed bar and they never seem to give a shit about my imput. But they were very nice and included me. So I went to their employee meeting. Some things that they were saying were right on the money. But there were a few things that are exactly opposite of what I tell my girls. I spoke with one of their girls Rosie. She’s got quite a bit of spunk. ” Rosie I hope you do very well at Coyote. Good luck. “
So last night I went to Georgetown. I was meeting with the owner of The Rhino. Cute place. They were rocking by the time I left. Very, very cute manager Dave. I’d do him in a pinch.
I went to the Holocaust Museum. It took me 4 hours to walk through it and I think I cried for the last hour. It was definitely a very moving experience. Today I am going to the Spy museum. By the way I am so fucking tired. I can’t wait to get home. Just in time for Mardi Gras. Aaron and Chantel, I feel for you. Good luck. By the way. Thanks Greg for the present!

posted by Liliana @ 11:51 AM

Thursday, February 12, 2004

Tonight was the 2 year anniversary party for the New Orleans bar. I can’t believe how sober I am. Brandi one of the new girls said something so nice to me. Let me preface this by saying that Brandi is already an accomplished bartender. She’s had a hard life but she’s hanging in. She came up to me tonight and thanked me. She said that she knew she was a good bartender. But when she started at Coyote that made her not only a good bartender but a better woman and person. Thanks Brandi. You just made my day. I’m not even PMS, but it was the inflection in her voice and the delivery that made me take notice. She made me feel, tonight, that maybe all of the work, long hours, the people hating me ; all of it, was worth it.
I’m obviously overtired because I feel like crying. So let’s move on to stupid men. There is this guy who I have met several times. He came to the anniversary party tonight. Well he keep on saying to me how he would love for us to go out and don’t worry he has no problem being a house boy. At what point is that attractive? I don’t want a house boy. I want a man.

posted by Liliana @ 2:19 AM

Tuesday, February 10, 2004

Big employee meeting in New Orleans yesterday. It really is surreal when I think about the content of these meetings. ” Well Becca, you need to squirt the soda gun directly at someone’s chest versus spraying the whole crowd, but remember only if they want that.” ” Well Andrea, when you are whipping someone please refrain from whipping them so hard that it leaves welts.” Aaron’s message to the girls was ” I don’t care if your father didn’t hug you as a child, don’t abuse my customers.”
We have a meeting every year right before Mardi Gras. Chantel and Aaron spent 2 weeks creating a schedule that would accomodate 90 bartending shifts in 5 days. We are open 24 hours a day for 5 straight days. We have made the second floor a dormitory so that the girls and the bouncers can sleep there before their next shift. It is craziness. Char from Ny is coming and I am also bringing 2 new girls from Austin. Aaron told me the schedule for one of the Austin girls. He said ” oh she will have a very easy week” Well I looked at her schedule. One day she works the 8pm- 4am shift she gets to sleep for a few hours to wake up and work the noon- 8 pm shift and then she sleeps a few hours to work the 4am- noon shift. Real easy. Veronica is coming back to help out during Mardi Gras. Very exciting people. She has the trashiest mouth ever. I have a feeling she can back those words up in bed. But I will ask one her ex’s. She claims there are very few people in New orleans she hasn’t been with. So I’ll just walk outside and ask the next man I see. I miss Veronica, it is going to be so nice to have her back!!
I’m off to the opening of th DC bar. This bar is a licensees bar. Unfortunately we do not have the best relationship. ” Lil it was a clerical error. That’s why you weren’t on the guest list.” DC girls, good luck. I wish you the best and I hope the bar rocks!!

posted by Liliana @ 1:38 PM

Monday, February 09, 2004

“Lil, i was writing you cause of one of your bouncer in new olreans,i didn’t want to go to the hotel to get cigarettes  and i wasn’t payin 6 bucks and i told Keri and he was so cool he took his own money ran to the corner store and got me cigarettes.and  he didn’t want me to pay him back .know body ever been that nice to me and i tryed to show him my tits and he said no.any way i wanted to say you have the best bouncers.and i love keri       …i love your new orleans coyote..         love ya..friends”

This was a recent letter I received about the New Orleans bouncers. I’m sure Kerri made sure his position was covered by another bouncer because if it wasn’t I will be less than thrilled. How very nice of him getting you cigarettes and not even looking at your tits for compensation. Well I commend you Kerri, nice job.
Quote of the week from Vance, bouncer Austin. The scenario was that a female customer was on the bar and a man was trying to touch her. Vance told the man he couldn’t do that. The man said it was cool because it was his girlfriend. Vance said ” That’s cool but when she’s up there, she’s my little sister. So HANDS OFF! “

posted by Liliana @ 12:07 PM

Sunday, February 08, 2004

No disrespect to handicapped people, but someone with cerebral palsy could do Devil better than Nina in New Orleans. This girl is a 5 ‘ 10 ” beautiful girl . But man it is like a dance contest during the special olympics when she does Devil went Down to georgia.
I just found out that one of my new New Orleans girls ( Staci ) is also a mud wrestler. When I was in college I did jello wrestling. Myself and three of my friends went against my then boyfriend ( Mark). He was 6′ 2″. Lean, mean, fighting machine. I’ll never forget slipping and then him grabbing my head and just shoveling jello in my face. Thank god it was raspberry, that would of really sucked if it was lime. Afterwards you were moved to a back room and hosed down with a firehose. My skin was red for three days. Oh memories!!

posted by Liliana @ 1:08 PM

Saturday, February 07, 2004

I’m not supposed to say this but I fucking hate people who steal. This is a cash business and you expect that you will catch a few people stealing. What upsets me is the people whom have worked for you for so long. At my bars, when you have been there for a few months and have proven your worth you are treated like family. The girls hang out. Management hangs out. We help the girls when they are in trouble.
It really hurts personally when you find out someone is stealing and you have known them for a long time . And you have let them into your family. I’m so disappointed.

posted by Liliana @ 2:31 PM

Thursday, February 05, 2004

We will start with the bad:
Dallas: My assistant manager from New Orleans was there on Sunday night and she did not have one good thing to say about you guys. ” I don’t care if there are 100 people or 4 people. get on the fucking bar, entertain those fucking 4 people and make sure everybody is served.” Every one of these Coyotes is a locals bar from Sun- Wed. What that means is you have to put energy into building your shift. Sunday night can be just as busy as Wednesday night with the right girls and the right energy. I could go on but it pisses me off too much. Expect a visit from me in the next 2 months. Sandy start being a proactive manager.
New Orleans: One of my own bars. I spent a few hours there yesterday. Ginger has worked for the bar for 2 years, she was working the day shift yesterday. At 4pm there were about 25 people there. If you are too tired to work, maybe you should go to the doctor. When the doctor sends me a note saying that you suffer from a desease that makes you too exhausted to do body shots and get on the bar, well I will give you time off until you fight this dibilitating desease. And you can come back to work refreshed and ready to make some money. Why is the concept, that if you try harder to solicit more business both the bar and the girl will benefit , so hard. You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to understand that this is a tip driven business and the more money the bar makes the more money you’ll make. That’s just plain statistics.
Now the good
Austin: I’m really proud of you girls. Marshsall told me that Esther was a star on Sunday night. I told you Esther that there was a lot to do other than the choreographed dances and that you could excell. I’m beaming I’m so proud.
Note ( Joyce) Unless you are in the fucking hospital or you are about to hang yourself off the nearest beam DO NOT CALL ME AT 4 AM. Any girls who know me , know that if they have a problem they can talk to me. But I am the president of this company and the perk to being president is that I get to go to sleep early, if I chose. Don’t pull that shit again unless it’s an emergency.

posted by Liliana @ 11:50 AM

Tuesday, February 03, 2004

It’s funny reading everyone’s expense reports. When I send Kevin anywhere he books himself at a Motel 6, eats at diners, and is always worried about saving the company money. I love him for that.
Now when I send Lee, he has to stay at a place that has cable modem for his computer, he eats calamari everyday ( I mean everyday) and has a propensity for jelly donuts. And payperviews a movie everyday ( I mean everyday).
Jacqui will be at one of these cities for 6 days. Her food reimbursements will be $10 and it will only be Starbucks receipts. ( Jeff and I always laugh at that ) Jeff is like ” how does she survive on just coffee all week?” It’s a mystery!
My expense reports are a lot different. Tickets to the children’s museum for my son. Kinko’s everyday to get my e-mail. ( I need a new laptop) And the big dinners. I’m the one whom takes everyone out. So I have the $400 dinner receipts. This particular trip I handed Kevin most of my receipts in a paper bag. He said ” Jesus Lil, this is going to take me forever to sort out.” Well Kevin , if i was organized perhaps your job would get a lot smaller. I love you Kevin.

posted by Liliana @ 2:07 PM

Monday, February 02, 2004

I don’t know if I mentioned this but at the Austin Girl Search we raised enough money for 8800 meals. We chose Austin Capital Food Bank as our local charity. I’m really proud of that.
OK quote of last week provided by Marshall ” I’m more dead than alive” . Opening a bar is not easy. The whole group had been putting in 16 hour days. Marshall and Kevin definitely logging in the most. I’m so tired I feel like I have lost some of my motor skills. We changed things up a bit and put in Kevin’s operating systems. Well, my system means everyone is out within an hour. Using Kevin’s system , Marshall and the girls have been stuck there for 2 – 3 hours after closing. “Kevin, I’m giving you 2 weeks to get this system working within that hour perameter. We are all fucking tired. Make it work.”
I’m back in New Orleans . Do you know who I get the most compliments about? I receive thousands of e-mails and calls every week. Without question I get more compliments about the New Orleans security staff than any girl in any of the bars. My bouncers in New Orleans rock. Good job. To my NY guys, I love you, I just think people are impressed by the fact that the New Orleans guys can do all the choreographed dances. Austin guys, you’ve got a hard act to follow.

posted by Liliana @ 11:46 AM