Lil Spill

The 2003-2018 blog of Liliana Lovell, Coyote Ugly Saloon Founder

March 30, 2012

Times when I cry: 1. On my birthday 2. 3x a year during my period 3. Sappy movies. I just got a call from my assistant . " Lil the New Orleans bar never picked up the Coyote truck . There are about a million people directly across the st from the bar and there isn't a beertub out or extra girls flyering" I am sitting at the Denver airport already feeling stupid for missing my flight now I feel...

March 30, 2012

I am a fucking idiot! I am so freaking stupid they should put my picture next to stupid in the dictionary! Idiot! I sat at the wrong gate and missed my plane. If that's not bad enough the correct gate was just across the hall ad I was so oblivious that I missed it! Fuck fuck fuck! Everything is booked out of Denver to New Orleans because of the final 4. Now I am booked to Dallas and on standby...

March 30, 2012

Walked into the Denver anniversary party to see Tessa in the Jennifer Beales flash dance working out outfit. (nude tights, black underwear and a cut up shirt). Love Tessa to death but it's sickening how good her body is. Full six pack. Legs and butt of a fitness model. I don't think that I could go back to my 20s workout 6 hours a day and look that good. Genetically I am inferior as are 99% of all women to...

March 29, 2012

"Lil can I go to dinner with you and Marsha" "No Kevin" "Why Lil" "because it's girls night and you are unable to speak about anything other then the military and republican propaganda" I then sent him a text. IF we allow you to meet us , these are the allowed topics . 1. Shoes2. Bags 3. Wrinkles 4. Cellulite 5. The Voice 6. Home decor Topics you are not allowed to talk about 1. Military 2. Fox news 3....

March 27, 2012

Why do they apply for my Russian visa just a couple weeks before I go? This drives me nuts. The travel agent in charge of this says " you need to be home to get this done" Guess what buddy, I am traveling! You screwed up and you need to rectify it! Really drives me insane. This will be my 4th time to Russia and every time I have traveled to Russia I have received my visa the same day...

March 24, 2012

Scene ( 74 degrees gorgeous New Orleans) Neighbor: " Lil you enjoying the rich people's weather" Me: " yes and why exactly is it rich people's weather?" Neighbor:" because if it was like this all the time we couldn't afford to live here." Me: " good point "

March 23, 2012

It's the small things in life. My son has a plantars wart on his foot. I know it's sick but the joy of digging it out and freezing it was just heaven. Lol Shout out to the New Orleans bar! Go get um' so nice that Milwaukee and New Orleans are hitting their stride right now

March 23, 2012

Funny someone I fired contacted Chantel recently. We just laughed. " Did you respond by saying the bar is doing better then ever and yes I had to fly there to help fix your mess!" Lee's wife is having a lot of contractions recently. The little peanut just needs to stay in that belly for two more weeks to be perfect! I told Lee I would fly there if he needed help. I know the feeling when you have no...

March 22, 2012

While on the elliptical machine I decided to read a short story called " An Unexpected Twist." hysterical. It's a man's tale of going through a series of colon operations. I burst out laughing at the gym when he speaks about his Ileostomy. This is when they hang part of your small intestine out of your body and attach it to a bag. Kindly referred to by the author as " bag of shit" . The part I found so...

March 21, 2012

" Bristol Palin wants Obama to call her." Are you freaking kidding me. I guess she has forgotten that it was Obama who made sure the Democrats didn't attack her and her family after she got knocked up at 17. Yesterday Trey (very conservative) called to tell me that he watched the Julianne Moore movie about Sarah Palin. The movie portrays Palin as an uneducated politician. Because he had liked her he then Youtubed the exact interviews and speeches that...

March 20, 2012

I don't know what's going on with Kevin and Lee but all of a sudden they want me to personally double check their new locations. One wants me to go to LA and San Diego. The other wants me to go to Lake Tahoe and Hawaii. While its nice to be needed, I have no idea how I can fit all these trips in. Between our new bar opening in Yekaterinburg, Russia in a few weeks, the anniversaries, and Jackson's...

March 19, 2012

OK starting tomorrow a 100 crunches a day! "No sex necessary: Women have orgasms at the gym, study shows By Jeanna Bryner LiveScience Women may not need a guy, a vibrator, or any other direct sexual stimulation to have an orgasm, finds a new study on exercise-induced orgasms and sexual pleasure. The findings add qualitative and quantitative data to a field that has been largely unstudied, according to researcher Debby Herbenick, co-director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion at...